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I’ve seen a lot of videos going around of urban-dwelling critters coming to humans for help with various problems, ranging from boxes stuck on their heads to young trapped down a storm drain, and it’s gotten me to thinking:
On the one hand, it’s kind of fascinating that they know to do that.
On the other hand, setting any questions of how this sort of behaviour must have arisen aside for the nonce, does it ever strike you how weird it is that we’ve got a whole collection of prey species whose basic problem-solving script ends with the step “if all else fails, go bother one of the local apex predators and maybe they’ll fix the problem for no reason”?
well, come to think of it, we’re at the top of the food chain but we almost exclusively hunt and kill prey out in the country.
raccoons and possums and foxes and crows all succeed in an urban environment because they’re opportunistic and observant. and almost none of them would have observed us pounce on one of their species and then start eating it, you know? a lot of them would have observed that we scream and chase them out of wherever we don’t want them to be, but other animals are territorial too. but there’s a number of situations where humans feed whoever’s bold enough to take them up on the offer, and we do tend to pull garbage off of other animals as soon as they slow down enough for us to catch. ‘a human got me but nothing bad happened’ is a much more frequent thing than ‘a human got me and tried to eat me’.
anyway like, we’re masters of our environment, we make weird shit happen all the time, we have lots of great food and sometimes we share, and we almost never eat someone. it makes sense for urban animals, over the last century or so, to just keep an eye out for opportunities to use us, and to pass the habit on to their kids.
It really is a weird, funny thing. Like yeah, technically they’re predators, and they get pretty screamy, especially if you try to take any of their stuff… but given the chance it seems like they’d rather help us out and sometimes they’ll just randomly give you food, so???
I mean, I guess in fairytales and myths we’ve got our fair share of stories about dangerous people/creatures who might well kill you or otherwise ruin your life, but to whom people nonetheless turn for help in desperate circumstances. So it’s not like the perspective is exactly a foreign thing to our own mindset, really… It’s just that, y’know, we can’t actually go make a deal with the faeries when there’s something we can’t figure out.
(Which brings me to an interesting thought about the ubiquitous rule about never eating the faery food lest you find yourself forever unsatisfied with anything in the human world - and the potential parallels to the dangers of feeding wildlife human food lest they become addicted and too tame and dependent to be safe for either themselves or us. Hmm.)
Okay, but that last bit with the Fae…makes almost perfect sense.
Of the stories I’ve read, the food of the Fae, its origins and effects, are often strange and/or obscure.- Just like our food to most animals.
The Fae are strange beings that seem to know weird things that give them power or an edge over us.- Just like us to animals.
The Fae work and live by strange rules also often nonsensical or obscure to us.- Just like us to animals.
The Fae can easily obtain vast amounts of things we consider rare/precious/desireable, and have no problem with dishing it out wantonly for no other reason than amusement.- Just like us to animals.
The Fae sometimes are amused by having us around, but only on their terms and IF it amuses/intrigues them.- Just like us to animals.
GUYS, I SENSE A PATTERN….
-they have arcane social conventions and the punishment for not paying the correct respects right is banishment, if you’re lucky, and death if you’re not.
-they have wild and unexpected parties where you’d least expect to find them, but if you’re bold enough to entertain them they’ll feed you and caress you and play with you all night.
-time runs strangely in their realm. their homes are summerlands: warm and bright, no matter the season. there is always fruit on their tables. but not everyone who comes in from the cold is let back out again.
-their games are cruel and complex and unfair, but if you can beat them by their own rules you will access riches beyond imagining.
-sometimes they just fucking fuck with you, the fuckheads.
-they will absolutely steal your children away. when your children return— if they ever do— they will come back strange. they will know things they shouldn’t. they won’t know things that they should. your strange children might survive, might even prosper, might take wives and husbands and have children of their own. but they will always be marked by their time away from your world.
-the price for pissing them off is always death. sometimes just you. sometimes your whole community.
-if you are very good, and very smart, and very brave, they will grant your wish.
My eyes just got wider and wider the further down I read.
OH! Reblogging because this ties in very well with the tumblr post about how Dogs might see us as elves
(via pancakewindow)
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it sucks being a suuuUuUUuper observant person bc i notice every little thing in every action & i literally get sad over the smallest things
(via heltidsidiot)
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I wonder what Hermione did the whole train ride to Hogwarts while Harry and Ron had the flying car
Probably had the only peace and quiet she’ll ever have for the rest of her life.
(Source: savaagecaabaage, via kiras-monkey-bum-face)
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“so how you doin’?”
(via kiras-monkey-bum-face)
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can the new thing please be putting quotes from the chilling adventures of sabrina over screencaps from sabrina the teenage witch?
i was completely ready to just accept the first one as a line from sabrine the teenage witch i didn’t question it at all
(via thenoiseandconfusion)
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It teaches your kids that it’s ok to invite the Fae into your home and sell them parts of your body
I feel like this post woke me up to something evil
(via kiras-monkey-bum-face)
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If depression was a musical
This is a bop
ok this keeps coming on my dash and every time the notes are filled with people being like WHAT IS THIS so i am HERE TO ENLIGHTEN YOU, FRIENDS
this is from the musical Firebringer which is free to watch on Youtube. it’s by Team StarKid of A Very Potter Musical fame (think you recognize the girl singing? that’s Lauren Lopez, also known as the funniest Draco Malfoy the world has ever seen)
anyway, Firebringer is a female-driven, hilarious musical about bisexual cavewomen and you are going to want to watch it. trust me.
WATCH FIREBRINGER!
Our entire office sings this at least once a week.
(Source: youtu.be, via kiras-monkey-bum-face)
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homeschooled-sausage asked:
Have you ever thought of a Chinese dragon combined with a dachshund or a ferret?
you mean like. a little. wiener dog dragon ohhohoohh man
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same energy:
(Source: dailyarianagifs, via thenoiseandconfusion)
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(via pancakewindow)
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2019 is gonna be all about the monstrous feminine. here’s to keeping it feral, grotesque and unhinged, ladies 🥂
(via caffeinewitchcraft)
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When somebody says that “a man likes to feel like a man,” all I hear is “A man likes to feel superior to you and it’s your job to make him believe it.”
Someone said this to me once, that a man needs to feel like a man, I replied “well I’m not stopping him” and had to watch this fragile creature try to explain to me that my strong personality could demean men.
Like, if I have to pretend you are a strong man and cater to that then clearly you’re not that strong dude.
Funny. A beta male pretending to be a alpha male.
The only way dudes who think that alpha male are a real thing could ever get someone to call them an alpha male is by purposefully surrounding themselves with people weaker and less secure than them.
Which, following the theme, sounds like an incredibly insecure, sad and pathetic thing to do.
If we suspend all logic and say that “alpha males” exist, the moment you purposefully aim to be one in a human society you immediately fail. Because there is nothing “alpha” about needing the recognition of others to feel like a strong man.
If The Alpha Male exists it is some dude who is kind and gets things done for the betterment of humanity and community, rather than his own ego, and does it with a strength of personality and conviction that get people to want to follow his lead.
Seeking Alpha makes you, in this system, a beta cuck.
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Hey, how about plots that involve artists or creators being “boring”, “bland” or “on autopilot” when they take their medication kindly fuck off?
We don’t need any more of this “medication crushes your creativity” nonsense, is harmful and disgusting. Also ironically, if you use it at this point, indicative of how shallow your own ideas and creations are.
THIS.
Depression crushes your will to create. Anxiety crushes your passion. I can’t personally speak to other illnesses but I would guess that, say, ADHD or OCD are not helpful in finishing creative projects. Fuck off entirely with the idea that art comes from unrestrained mental illness. Nobody can create anything during a panic attack or after committing suicide.
And for fuck’s sake STOP IT with Van Gogh, you ignorant fucks. Van Gogh had his most prolific artistic period while actively being treated for his mental illness. And if aaaaaaaaaaall these famous artists got their talents from mental illness, you’d have fifty examples at your fingertips and wouldn’t need him as a poster boy.
And finally, I do not owe you art. If my choice WERE actually between “make art” and “treat mental illness,” it wouldn’t be some tragedy if I chose to be happy and healthy. What a selfish person you would have to be to decree that another human being has to be miserable so you can add to your pile of pretty things you’ll look at once and forget entirely the next minute.
The life and happiness of the artist is worth more than the fulfillment people get from looking at their art. Even if art was created better out of misery and despair, no one should go through that so you can appreciate the
aesthetic.
it’s been five (5) years since I got this tattoo and half the people who ask to read it get super mad over it, but the above trope was a huge barrier to me getting better and I gotta say: I might still make art when I’m sad, but I’ll never again forget what I’m worth.
My wording may seem harsh to some of you lol but it suits my personality and motivates me.
Art isn’t worth doing if it can’t bring you happiness too, friends. You deserve to seek better for yourself, so don’t let this world trick you into thinking pain is the source of beauty.
[tattoo caption: If you can’t make good art when happy, you’re probably a terrible artist.]
(via geekandmisandry)
